Girls Frontline: The Rules of HQ
by CabooseHelpsU
Summary: What happens when a rookie Commander and his money-loving assistant are put in charge of dozens of very human-like Tactical Dolls in a war against other futuristic robots? Chaos, absolute chaos. Poor Commander, no amount of rules will keep him safe! Collaborative project, I don't own Girls Frontline.
1. HQ Rules 1-20

Hello! CabooseHelpsU here. This is a project I've been thinking of doing myself, but a friend of mine beat me to the punch. This is a collab project, not dissimilar to the "Things involving Shipgirls that are not allowed" fanfiction, in the Kancolle section. So far, these are really just prompts (but when I get the time I intend to go more into detail on the unfortunate situations behind each rule!), but feel free submit writings to me; it'll be passed on for approval, and added to this story to be expanded. So, enjoy!

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Girls Frontline, or I would make the story more cheerful (not really)! Which, by the way, you should probably play the game to get the jokes here...**

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 **Girls Frontline: The Rules of HQ**

 **1-20**

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Rule 1: Please have mercy on the base staff, including the Commander. They're human. They reserve the right to create rules as needed.

Rule 2: Kalina _is_ a human. Not a T-Doll. Please stop trying to 'fix' her, and attempting to disprove this will strip you of protection the Commander can give.

Rule 2a. Believe us, we have tried to fix her obsession with money.

Rule 3: Do not ask Helian about her romantic relationship or the mixers. _Especially_ the mixers.

Rule 4: Kalina is to hire a crew of workers for moving the Dormitory furniture, _immediately_. The Commander, G&K engineers, and several T-Dolls have already required hospital/repair-shop visits.

Rule 4a. Yes, AR15, if you ask kindly, the Commander can assist with moving the inflatable mattresses. He's not _that_ flimsy!

Rule 5: Discussion of an anime adaptation of G&K is strictly forbidden.

Rule 6: Human personnel with animal ears are not to be treated as pets.

Rule 6a. Even if they insist on it. Especially IDW and ART556!

Rule 7: Do not make fun of Super Shorty's height. While she insists she doesn't mind, you are still bothering her.

Rule 7a. Do not buy children clothes for her either, even if those are probably the only non-custom made clothes that fit her.

Rule 8: Do not make references to UMP-45's chest size. Her "Punishment" is your only warning.

Rule 8a. Even if the other T-Dolls don't remember, you do.

Rule 8b. Yes, even if UMP-45 does not exist.

Rule 8c. Do not compare UMP-45 to SM-1 either.

Rule 9: Ask for a doll's permission before you touch them. Ignore this rule at your own risk.

Rule 9a _. Especially_ the tails of certain T-Dolls. They can feel it.

Rule 9b. Do not pull the tails as well. You do **NOT** want to know where they are connected to!

Rule 10: "If you like her then you better put a ring on her!"

Rule 11: Any one who helps WA2000 in the kitchen is required to taste test it first.

Rule 11a. This includes any beverages, even ones pre-packaged. We don't know how she managed to mess up the tea but NTW was stuck in repairs for a full week.

Rule 11b. WA2000 is not allowed into the kitchen on her own. Just because you don't want to taste it doesn't mean you should leave it to everyone else.

Rule 12. Woe befall anybody who steals WA2000's pudding.

Rule 12a. _Or_ her chocolate ice cream.

Rule 13:Custom-built simulation disks must be approved by the commander and Kalina.

Rule 13a. Custom-built simulation disks now **banned!** You know what you did, PPK and SOPMOD.

Rule 14: Do not accept food from P7.

Rule 14a. Be wary of any "advice" given by P7.

Rule 14b. Additionally, if you believe P7 has spent more than 15 minutes in the bathroom, please notify maintenance so they may quarantine the area for inspection. We do not need another exploding toilet incident.

Rule 14c. Despite P7's insistence, she does not have a elder sister working as a medic in the navy.

Rule 15: Cute lolis are for headpats. Griffin & Kruger will not help you get out of jail for breaking this!

Rule 16: The AR squad is responsible for M16 when she gets drunk. Like really drunk. We're tired of the sexual harassment complaints.

Rule 16a. Likewise, the Commander will provide no protection if you accuse her of "Sis-conning" M4. It's a rude thing to say!

Rule 16b. Addendum A is to be withheld, _even though it is a true statement_.

Rule 17: Do not give HK416 ANY liquor. No, we won't talk about what happened again.

Rule 18: T-Dolls in skill training are to stop using Simonov as target practice in lieu of actual practice drones. We understand that some of you vent your frustrations on your targets, but using a T-Doll is completely unacceptable.

Rule 19: Do not ever touch Ribeyrolles' blood bag. She needs it for a good reason.

Rule 20: Using shotgun T-Dolls as shielded battering rams to get close to the enemy is strictly prohibited. While they may have armor and shields, it isn't an excuse to pick them up and charge towards the enemy with them in tow so you can slap them silly.


	2. HQ Rules 21-40

21: Whoever keeps messing with the photo frames on the wall, **stop it now**. The Commander has been sleep-deprived from OCD.

21a. Likewise, whoever drew on the portraits of G&K command, stop that as well. The last thing we need is Kalina breaking into fits of laughter when Mr. Kruger and Ms. Helian come to visit.

22: "POLICE YOUR BRASS! TIRED OF G36 COMING IN TO CLEAN UP AFTER YOU!" -Range Safety Officer

22a. "Or mount a brass catcher." -GK Janitor

23: SOPMOD, kindly stop bringing in SF bodies for dissection. The cleaning staff is tired of having to mop up the corpse when you're done.

24: "If this photo is real then does Squad 404 really sing at wedding ceremonies when they're not out on missions? Then let us give the newlyweds our blessings…"

24a. "Who the hell thought of **this** rumor?!" -416

24b. "I think we should try it!" -UMP9

24d. "No. Just...no." [REDACTED]

25: Please do not bother retired T-dolls. Despite not fighting directly they are very important in helping with regular base maintenance as well as running G&K's many subdivisions.

26: Stop spreading the rumor that FNC will copulate with you by bribing her with a chocolate bar.

26a. Or that TAC-50 will do it with anyone who offers genuine maple syrup.

26b. Or any of the Chinese Tactical Dolls with any kind of Chinese cooking.

26c. Actually, if you really want to have intimacy with any tactical doll, just ask them.

26d. Provision 26-C is to be rescinded **IMMEDIATELY.** Do not attempt to have sex with, or attempt to proposition for sex, with any tactical doll. We're not sure how DSR-50 managed to get a live octopus into the base.

26e. Any Dolls that you have OATHED are excluded from the D Clause. DSR-50 however is not excluded.

27: Do not attempt to bribe SAA with cans of cola.

27a. Denying her Cola is also not allowed, we don't need another new wall.

27b. Do not start Coke vs Pepsi debate with her as well. She prefers Pepsi. Period.

28: Woe unto the one stealing USAS-12's instant noodle collection.

28a. Saiga, at least ask permission for some first.

29: Thompson is not allowed to start a gang war with M14 - M14 is not a gangster despite what others may say.

29a. Same goes for SVD and WA2000.

30: Stop spreading rumors that the 1:10:00 construction timer has a possibility to yield a gold rarity pink hair girl who wants to be an idol and sounds like IDW. We'll get sued.

31: Any and all 'stage performances' must be approved by the Commander or Kalina.

31a. Any performances are to be approved by Mk. 23 _**and** _the Commander! We don't need another rap battle between Spitfire and RO635. The Commander's _not_ using his personal money to buy new windows again.

31b. "Even if it was a bloody brilliant battle!"

32: T-Dolls are no longer allowed to use their dummies as target practice. We're _not_ going through core hell again.

33: T-Dolls are no longer to experiment with their dummies in any way. This includes in the bedroom.

33a. "Lewd!" -Saiga-12

34: Bottle caps are not, and will not, be a form of acceptable currency. So stop trying to pay IOP with bottle caps.

35: Building a PC with M1918's Titan Fire Control Chip is strictly forbidden. Itas it is NOT a PC component.

36: Dinergates are allowed to be kept as pets, as long as you have de-weaponized them and control their behaviour.

36a. For the last time, please control your Dinergates. We have been getting countless reports of Dinergate stealing T-Dolls' undergarments.

36b. No, not everyone can have a "RO Dinergate." You may, however, create one of a Doll you like.

36c. "Create one of a Doll you like" does not mean remove the memory core of a doll and put it into a dinergate body!

37: SAT8 is no longer allowed to touch or go near "Chopsticks" or "Banana."

37a. The list of things SAT8 should never get within grabbing distance has expanded to anything that is vaguely animal-shaped and fluffy.

37b. No one is allowed to Cosplay as "Gambier Bay" near SAT8 either.

38: Whoever took pictures of AR-15 dressing up, please step forward so the rest of the AR team can have words.

39: Applying excessive emotional load on AK-12 is strictly forbidden; death or serious injury may result from emergency shutdown of emotion module.

40: SOPMOD, while the Commander appreciates your efforts to increase AR Team's "flexibility and improvisation", Persica was not referring to your skills in the game "Twister". The inflatable mattresses are unstable, and could lead to undue injuries.

40a. Likewise, those mattresses are not meant to hold more than two Dolls at most; they were limited edition, so treat them well.

40b. To all T-Dolls, the "Twister Mattresses" were given to the AR Team as a gift on behalf of their outstanding performance. No amount of puppy eyes, bribery, threats, or tears can change that.

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 **Uploader's Note:** Well, there's the second section of the list. The Google Docs this is from has over 200, although that's not quite accurate since numbers were skipped. Still a lot, and I can't wait to have the time to write for each situation! I'm particularly proud of 21, 24, 31, and 40.

Hope you guys have a good day/night!

Caboose out.

19NOV2018 EDIT: Shoutout to jusblekyuri for making sure RO635 doesn't find a reason to kill me; in rule 31a I had called her RO63'6'. Good catch!


	3. HQ Rules 40-60

**Uploader's Note:** Hello, Caboose here! Been rather busy, in case you didn't read the most recent chapter of "Midway" by TheKitsuneLord12. But, here's the next 20 rules or so! I've not gotten much in the way of requests though...By the way, some formatting stuff. Underlined items are meant to stand in for strikethrough, but FFdotNet doesn't do that.

As for getting references, you have several video games to play!

Enjoy!

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 **40:** **Rule 39** **Revised** : SOPMOD, while the Commander appreciates your efforts to increase AR Team's "flexibility and improvisation," Persica was not referring to your skills in the game "Twister". The inflatable mattresses are unstable and could lead to undue injuries.

40a. Likewise, those mattresses are not meant to hold more than two Dolls at most; they were limited edition, so treat them well.

40b. To all T-Dolls, the "Twister Mattresses" were given to the AR Team as a gift on behalf of their outstanding performance. No amount of puppy eyes, bribery, threats, or tears can change that.

 **40c. Due to overwhelming requests, we have added a regular mat "Twister" to the board games collection.**

 **41:** Under no circumstances should Young Grizzly ever be brought near IDW or PP-2000. She's already had nightmares of both of them bullying her of her lunch money.

 **42:** Smoke grenades should not be used to get high.

42a. Ingram and UMP45 cannot be locked in a room together with smoke grenades.

 **43:** We don't care if you're a badass, all T-Dolls must undergo regular maintenance.

 **44:** "The Shadow Chair is the regal throne of Halloween. Those who sit in it are only allowed to use delicate wine glasses, even if they're just drinking Cola."

44a. Rule 47 has been revised. I don't even know how you managed to write in this, SAA, but this is **unacceptable**.

44b. The Commander formally apologizes to SAA for blaming the broken glass on her.

44c. Meanwhile, P7 is to have her candy privileges rescinded for the month of October, and it is up to her to apologize to SAA. No, the Commander won't save you from this fate.

 **45:** All T-Dolls need to pick up any messes they create. No, SOPMOD the commander isn't angry at you for spilling orange juice over the Halloween carpet, as Halloween was ending soon.

45a. Rule 45 does **NOT** mean that Halloween is a one time event. The Commander had to explain to his superiors why several young T-Dolls were in tears, and he wishes to prevent any further misunderstandings.

 **46:** Negev is no longer allowed to dorm with German WW2 guns.

46a. Neither should Suomi be dorm with Soviet guns. Mosin-Nagant is a grey area

 **47:** Everyone is awesome, no matter their rarity.

 **48:** Video games are not considered combat simulations. Regardless of the level of realism.

48a. Yes this includes ARMA

48b. This especially applies to KSG and RFB.

48c. Model L is especially banned from playing Metal Gear Solid 5: The Phantom Pain, it has started to give her... **_ideas._**

 _48d. **Nobody**_ will escape the Commander's Wrath if you bring anything Metal Gear up around him _or_ the AR team. That is your only warning.

 **49:** In spite of Rule 48, Rainbow 6 Siege real life comparison/roleplay is fine. Just DONT use actual ammunition.

49a. Architect is not allowed to be used as "Hostage."

49b. Yes, _even if_ she consents to it.

49c. AK-12 is not allowed to participate in "Hostage" mode! We all know what you are going to do.

49d. DP28, stop making others worship you as "The Lord" during the roleplay. That meme is decades old.

49e. Dolls on the same team as 416 are to be checked for a pocket trumpet before rounds.

49f. Saying "SPIN THE WHEEL!" is also off limits

49g. You can't team kill MP5 on the basis of "Rook Mine."

49h. 416 is not allowed to be equipped with a VFL scope. You know what happened when we let her run outside with that thing.

49i. And neither should EVO 3 be allowed to rush outside. There's a reason she's not as strong as she used to be.

 **50:** Attempts to replicate Minovsky Particles from the Universal Century are to be discontinued immediately. While saturating an area with M-particles before moving in may sound like a good idea on paper, the pollution and subsequent scrambling of communications in that area for a month, simply put, isn't worth it.

50a. This is also extended to Photonic Energy, Getter Rays, G-Stone energy, Spiral Energy, psycho-frame, or any sort of Black Technology. Please forward all experimental requests to IOP's Research Division.

 **51** : Stop spreading rumors that M1 Garand bites people's thumbs. "Garand thumb" only applies to the gun and the gun alone.

 **52:** "I _know_ we live in a post-apocalyptic wasteland but this is not Fallout, stop looting the bodies of fallen dummies, this means **you** , SOPMOD."

52a. Absolutely nobody is to attempt to recreate **any** wildlife from that series. R&D unanimously shut that one down upon hearing it.

52b. Saying 'Liberty Prime' in Bloody Mary fashion to scare T-Dolls utilizing Russian or Chinese weaponry is **forbidden**.

52c. All experiments into building an actual Liberty Prime are to be halted, as impressive it is. Not only does this waste our very limited resources, but it would also start an arms race with Sangvis that we cannot win.

52d. We're expanding this to include Fallout power armor suits as well.

52e. Alright, the next person who tries to produce a Fat Man tactical nuclear anti-tank weapon is being put in a cell with IDW's mix-tape on it playing non-stop, we're still scrubbing down one of the barracks for radiation because of that!

52f. M1911, please stop quoting Benny whenever you execute a Sangvis Ferri enemy. You're a Colt M1911, not a goddamn Browning Hi-Power.

52g. No T-Dolls are to threaten each other with crucifixion for being "degenerates".

 **53** : IWS-2000 should never be allowed to play another game of Yu-Gi-Oh.

53a. In the rare event that she is able to start a game of one, any measures should be taken to prevent her from assembling Exodia with all 5 cards.

 **54:** G41, please put on more clothes. We don't care if it feels hot, you're not allowed inside until you put on a jacket.

54a. Add a skirt to that… Commander is still in therapy from last time.

54b. That means having _underwear_ on, too…

54c. "G41, you know the commander will give you more attention if you dress more normally… Right?"

 **55:** The T-Doll responsible for placing bright green crystals across the base - subsequently giving half the base heart attacks over a supposed 'Tiberium infestation' - is to report to the Commander's office immediately. We already have our hands full with alien material; a self-replicating ecological apocalypse is the last thing we, or this world, needs.

 **56:** No, Type 95 was never in the navy. Stop asking her that.

 **57** : SPP-1 should never be put into a washing machine and have it set to "heavy" or a similar setting.

 **58:** NTW-20, please return AEK-999's headphones. We know you stole them.

 **59:** Please do not challenge Carcano M91/38 to assassinate Mr. Kryuger, especially not when he's in a convoy.

 **60:** Type 100, stop making M1918 BAR say "poi".

60a. "And I don't even know what it means!" -M1918 BAR

60b. "Poi means poi!" -IDW

60c. IDW is not to edit any part of this page. Period.

60d. No, M1918 BAR has no idea what "Believe in Justice, and a determination to fist!" means. Please stop bothering her with weird questions, or you will be punished severely and unusually.


	4. HQ Rules 61-80

**GLF: Rules of HQ 61-80**

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 **Rule 61:** Please stop showing pineapple pizza to SAT. The Commander had to employ an entire night to comfort her over it last time

 **Rule 62:** A friendly reminder that no T-Doll is authorized to be a drill sergeant. That being said, whoever organized last week's boot camp, you're paying for M14's treatment.

 **Rule 63:** M14 is not to be convinced that she is something along the lines of a "war goddess" or a "doomsday device". _At best_ , she is only as strong as a demigod.

63A: Special permission is required from authorized IOP personnel before any Digimind upgrades can be applied to M14.

 **Rule 64:** If you stumble across G11 sleeping somewhere on the base during off-duty hours, leave her be. Do NOT wrap her up and deliver her to HK416 with a note.

 **Rule 65:** A reminder that you have guns in addition to whatever other gear you are issued. Please use them first instead of charging into melee screaming "LEEEROYYYYYYY"

65a. No, screaming "FOR THE EMPEROR" is not an applicable situation to use your melee equipment either.

65b. Nor is "I'M GOING TO PUNCH THE SH*T OUT OF HER."

65c. Any physical attacks on Architect will result in immediate logistic punishment and withholding of pay, as well as manual retrieval of replacement parts.

65d. No SOPMOD, this is not an excuse to hurt her since you can fix her back up. Poor girl's been through enough.

56e: Any battle cry ("Ayo Gurkhali", "Haaka Palle", "Ura", etc) is **no excuse** for using melee equipment.

Bagpipes are not an excuse either. They are a weapon in and of itself.

 **Rule 66:** A T-Doll must be assigned to keep watch over MDR's internet activity on her cell phone to ensure that she does not stray as far as the /b/, /pol/, /r9k/, and/or the /v/ boards on 4chan.

66a. And neither should MDR ever have access to any pornographic sites, including but not limited to: P******, B*******, XV*D**S, *H*n***, H*n**iH***n, d*nb**ru, and g*lb**ru.

66b. **"** _Who the hell thought it was a good idea to list this with the younger handguns around?!_ **"** -A _concerned_ T-Doll-

 **Rule 67:** Whoever decided that replacing the shotgun T-Dolls' guns with water blasters was a great idea, please report to the Commander's office.

67a. The punishment will not be severe.

 **Rule 68:** "Perform a field strip" means break down your weapon. It does **NOT** mean "strip off all your clothes."

 **Rule 69:** Do not ask how SPP-1 is floating in the air. **It just works**

69a. Also, refrain from asking Type 64 and M1919A4 how they do it with their Halloween costumes, they "don't know" either.

 **Rule 70:** Effective _immediately_ , all German WWII T-Dolls are barred from the chemical weapons storage.

 **Rule 71:** Needling M590 about 'TRANS-AM' is to cease immediately. We don't know where you got the idea from, but M590 does _not_ have a system that causes her to turn red and allows her to perform 3 times better than she usually does.

71a. Claims that M590 has a 'GN Drive' to power TRANS-AM are to be dropped immediately. M590 is not happy about being forced to answer these inane questions of yours. Give the girl some space!

 **Rule 72:** RO-635 is no longer allowed to do morning wake up calls.

 **Rule 73:** Do not give M4A1 cinnamon rolls. The punishment will be severe and entirely deserved.

73a. "m45, there is no reason to actively avoid her because of the events in the detention center, aka Operation _Mario's Princess_. She does _not_ hate nor blame you because of it."

 **Rule 74:** SOPMOD, cease and desist your attempts to "Bring AR-15 back to life."

74a. "SOP, I'm **alive** , that was my dummy, you idiot!" - AR-15

 **Rule 75: '** Full Armor' upgrades to shotgun T-Dolls should be done with permission from command first. While expanding armor plating and attaching it to an exoskeleton along with shields is a sound idea, the amount of resources that was spent doing so has left the Commander in tears.

75a. Do not use this as an excuse to strap more subsystems onto the armor. There's only so much our shotgun T-Dolls can carry before they collapse from the weight.

75b. Along with that; Spas-12's armor, shield, ax-shotgun was too costly to maintain and will be discontinued from here on.

 **Rule 76:** M4A1 is now required to see a counselor weekly. You should know why, AR team.

 **Rule 77:** FAL's pet ferret is **NOT** emergency ration.

77a. Neither is P226's seal, despite how she would occasionally nibble on it

 **Rule 78:** Please keep Saiga away from DSR-50. The younger T-Dolls are rather frightened.

78a. Same goes for keeping Saiga-12 away from FNC. She doesn't need more PTSD material.

 **Rule 79:** Call HK416 a 'white-haired she-devil' at your own risk. What happened to the last Sangvis force Squad 404 encountered should be enough to dissuade you from trying.

79a. "Although her chest does hide a little monster."

79b. " _I'm going to_ **_kill_** _you!"_ -HK416

 **Rule 80:** Yes, Springfield is a very motherly character. Yes, she is very close to Lee. No, this does not mean Lee is her "husband."

80a. The same goes for G36.

80b. "NO, I'M NOT THEIR DAUGHTER DAMMIT." - Kar 98K

80c. "DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT." -WA2000

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 **Note:** CabooseHelpsU here! I hope you enjoyed the rules. Not much to say, I think. Gotta save my resources for the upcoming operations, but I'm kinda drained from trying to 'rescue' a certain wannabe Yaandere with "increased drop rates".

As I've said before, you can either find the document this was from and suggest edits or you can just PM me here, whatever works for getting rules on.

Oh, and I suppose I should put my friend ID up here, if you guys want it. It's: 13828. Same name as on here, I guess.

Caboose out.


	5. HQ Rules 81-100

**GFL: Rules of HQ 81-100**

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 **Rule 81:** Any attempts to create weapons from Warhammer are to be disallowed. Not even M2HB can handle a bolter shot's recoil.

 **Rule 82:** None of the German WWII Era Dolls may attempt to produce any form of weaponry. Their first several creations were bizarre...still trying to figure out how they managed to make cold fusion stable.

82a. As are those of the Soviet Cold War Era T-Dolls, their creations are more absurd than the Germans.

82b. As are those of the American Cold War Era Dolls, though the prototype has been authorized for use to make ice cubes.

82c. No T-Dolls are allowed to create new weapons, period!

82d. No Moscovium is to be given to any T-Doll, we _don't_ need more, potentially stronger, ELIDS showing up.

 **Rule 83:** Attempting to create various "Magic Guns" is prohibited. While having a real version of SCP-3108 would be very useful, it's way too dangerous and expensive to try and produce such a device. This is not including the fact we don't have Anomalies.

 **Rule 84:** No attempts to create "Power Armor" of any type is allowed. Again the premise is sound but we have armor plate attachments for Shotguns already, we're still working on fine-tuning the process for normal dolls.

84a. Yes, we know that M16A1 received armor, but aside from her being designed for it, it's still very much a prototype and only works on the EXO, so stop asking.

 **Rule 85:** Addressing the influx of new fire support options, no, we cannot procure self-propelled guns

85a. No Ak5, we cannot requisition a Bandkanon. As much as we want to.

85b. BGM team, we are aware of your lack of self-defense. Please keep in mind that your fire control software is optimized for the ATGM. M870 still remembers when you tried operating something other than the launcher.

85c. No, we do not have plans to make the "Hammer of Dawn" or any similar orbital cannons. Kinetic tungsten orbital bombardment platforms, however, _are_ being taken into consideration.

 **Rule 86:** All grenadier equipment is now required to be kept in appropriate lockers at the armory. The Commander does not appreciate everyone making a new door every time there's an emergency sortie.

 **Rule 87:** Anyone who found K2's dropped bullets, shell casings, or any gun parts please kindly return them to her. She greatly needs those.

 **Rule 88:** T-Dolls are advised that breaking into the labs for unauthorized modifications will be given to said labs for punishment detail.

 **Rule 89:** No, PP-90 does not have an ancestor, and is certainly not the descendant of an idol.

89a. Nor does giving her any "Fictional Stones" change who she is.

89b. Yes her hairstyle is popular in media, it does not mean she is creating an army.

 **Rule 90:** Whoever made the child modifications to certain T-Dolls without their knowledge, please report to the Commander. You will be rewarded greatly.

 **Rule 91:** Giving ~~Free~~ ANY Oath Certificates to Elphelt is off limits!

91b. As is handing her a marriage certificate.

91c. No "Forced Weddings" are allowed either.

91d. Yes, that includes any form of love potion or any other illegal substances.

 **Rule 92:** Vector, please do not use Molotov cocktails outside of combat. "Heating up the room" is not a valid excuse.

92a. Incendiary grenades are not to be allowed as well.

92b. ANY flammable substance is not to be on Vector's person while off duty.

 **Rule 93:** Stop asking Skorpion if her twintails are detachable. They aren't. Probably.

 **Rule 94:** PPSh, the construction worker is the best you can get, we will not provide you any SCV, Dreadnought, Zaku, or any of the fictional mechas.

 **Rule 95:** To any rifle T-Dolls, please stop trying to kill opponents using ideas from Call of Duty montages.

 **Rule 96:** If you find an octopus that can talk, immediately put it back where it came from and don't listen to it. Especially if it started saying "Iä! Iä!" Double for anything that goes "TEKELI-LI! TEKELI-LI!"

 **Rule 97:** Some of the T-Dolls are religious, which is absolutely fine. This, however, does NOT give them a reason to start a holy war by any name.

 **Rule 98:** No more "T-Doll T-pose" memes, I think HK416 is about to blow over it.

 **Rule 99:** Contender is not a "Magus Killer', so please stop calling her that.

 **Rule 100:** No debates over Contender's "gender" can be held. Yes, she looks like a guy in her normal outfit, and yes, she can totally look like a girl in her maid outfit, but no, Contender is still female in the end, just like all the other T-Dolls.

100a. 5-7, trying to grope Contender for the reason of "wanting to make sure" isn't valid. Any punishment you get from her is your own fault.

* * *

 **Note:** Ah, finally, I've been wanting to release this for a bit... _thank you_ , college and the real world.

We're already 100 rules in, and there are quite a few more to go, so look forward to it!

Remember, if something is Underlined, that stands in as a strikethrough. As T-Dolls get more and more heated over these rules, they're going to use it quite a bit. Poor commander, there will be no mercy for you!


	6. GFL: Rules of HQ 101-130

**GFL: RULES OF HQ 101-130**

 **Sorry for the wait, notes at the bottom! Enjoy~**

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 **Rule 101**. Thunder, it is good that you are trying to express your feelings, but please do not fire indoors. Patching up the holes left behind by the .50 BMG is difficult.

101a. Please, stop asking where to get a dragon tail. We don't know why you need it, but dragons do not exist!

101b."Huh? So the new dish you mention you want to cook is dragon tail?!" - M950A

 **Rule 102**. Please get permission from the Commander before forming any music clubs or bands, or everyone would use this as an excuse to avoid combat duty.

102a. And please make sure you actually know how to play the musical instruments. Yes, the band formed by ATK squad does know how to play them.

102b. No, triangles do not count.

102c. Even if Mr. Kruger played it once. He is more than capable of playing several musical instruments.

 **Rule 103**. Please stop asking the Airborne Fairy to drop you on Pochinki. There is nothing special about that place, why do you want to go there anyway?

103b. No, we are not recreating a battle royale in the abandoned area nearby.

 **Rule 104**. Stop asking M37 if her breasts can hold her own shotgun.

 **104a. The answer is yes, she can.**

104b. I don't know who wrote this but- oh? Ah, nevermind.

 **Rule 105.** Tac-50, we get that you love maple syrup, but please stop using all the base's supply of it for your morning coffee.

 **Rule 106**. SAR-21, please speak in proper English. Not everyone here can understand Singlish. Pretty sure only Singaporeans and Malaysians can understand that.

 **Rule 107**. Please do not use Type97S's shield as a pot lid without her consent.

107a. Do not use her shield like a frisbee either.

107b. Nor as Captain America's shield, it is not made of some fictional metal that's way better than anything reality has to offer.

 **Rule 108**. G11 is not an abominable creation of "mad German scientists".

108b. Nor is she "Kraut space magic"

 **Rule 109**. Just because M1887 can change her voice does not give you the right to give her Grizzly's clothes, boots and motorcycle

 **Rule 110**. Stop making M82A1 cosplay as Yuzuriha Inori. While they look similar, you are bothering M82.

 **Rule 111**. Do not call M1887 "the Governator". Despite the obvious connection, it is rude to call her as such.

 **Rule 112**. You may not send a dummy in your place for briefing/debriefing.

 **Rule 113**. Rations can only be taken once and share among ALL dummies, not 1 portion for each dummy. Yes, we are talking about you, SPAS-12.

113a. Do not feed SPAS-12 any additional ration as well.

113b. Especially you, Nagant M1895. You don't need to play up to the babushka role by feeding her excessive amount of food.

 **Rule 114.** No one is to mess with any other T-Dolls equipment. You may know your own firearm well but you don't know what modifications other T-Dolls may have done to theirs to improve performance. Yes, this is a result of people ruining SPAS-12's speed loaders and guide system.

 **Rule 115.** Please do not waste action reports. Kalina already has to undergo acupuncture twice a week for her carpal tunnel.

115a. On that matter, please use the power supply conservatively. Kalina has been complaining her station does not have enough power to write the reports.

115b. In relation to Clause A; RFB, you're the one using up all the power with your late night gaming, aren't you?

 **Rule 116**. Galina of AGS-30, please stop trying to steal SAR-21's glasses. Your team doesn't need to be a glasses trio.

 **Rule 117.** Galina is not allowed to have her scope while off duty. You know why.

117a. Galina is not allowed to have any cameras on her person.

117b. Galina is also not allowed to have access to Dinergates, fairies, or any sort of autonomous drone capable of carrying a camera of any sort!

 **Rule** 118\. Galina is not allowed in anyone else's dorm!

118a. "Galina, stop complaining about the rules. If you'd just behaved, there wouldn't be any need for them!"

 **Rule 119.** IDW is banned from welcoming new recruits.

119a. DSR and Saiga are also banned from welcoming new recruits.

 **Rule 120.** For your own safety, please wear ear protection when accepting a 1:10 package from IOP.

 **Rule 121.** IDW is not to be given to access to any form of Helium.

121a. Nor any access to Sulfur Hexafluoride.

 **Rule 122.** Pushing for Super Sass and NTW-20 to get into a relationship is starting to make them uncomfortable. **~~Even though it's obvious they should.~~**

 **Rule 123.** Contrary to popular belief, Super SASS is _not the_ real protagonist. This is a PMC organization, there _are_ no protagonists.

123a. **"Except for maybe M4A1, but who even cares about her?"**

123b. " **To the one who said they don't care about me; who's laughing now that I have the mini Jupiter, bitch?" -M4A1 Mod 3**

123d. _***Sighs***_. Edits are not to be made to spite other Dolls. Come on guys, be nice!

 **Rule 124.** Please do not allow Kar98 entry to the hot springs without a lifejacket- there are no lifeguards.

 **Rule** 124a. All T-Dolls are to **STOP** pestering the Commander to allow the budget to said lifeguards. Just wear the lifejacket!

124b. All T-Dolls are to **STOP** pestering the Commander to be said lifeguard. Wear the damn G&K-issued life jacket.

 **Rule** 125\. OTs44, **please** do not try to hack the military's SatCom array- there are no Martians there, and even if there were, they wouldn't give you food.

 **Rule 126.** P7 and ART556 are no longer allowed into the Japanese Doll cabinet- while it is funny, drawing Mr. Kruger's mustache on each one ruin them. They are _antiques_ , for Griffin's sake!

 **Rule 127**. Do not enter the firing range when it is active. You have been warned. Should be self-explanatory.

 **Rule 128**. Avoid any buildings behind the Firing range when NTW-20 takes to the firing range.

128a. Same goes for M99 and DSR

128b. Avoid the general vicinity of the firing range when the Heavy Ordnance Corps are out. This should be self-explanatory.

 **Rule** 129\. I don't care if it's historically accurate; Sten Mk II's weapons are **NOT** to be thrown like grenades, she throws enough things already!

 **Rule 130**. The Commander is not responsible for whatever Welrod MK II does to the culprit stealing from her chess set. You have been warned!

130a. _The same goes for Lee Enfield's tea set and Springfield's Coffee set._

130b. " **Taking my coffee set? Ufu. Ufufufufu~"**

130c. "We get it Springfield, we get it. C-calm dow-!"

130d. "... _I trust that this is taken care of. Report to the repair bay after this, I'm going to take a nap._ "

* * *

 **NOTES!**

 **Welcome back! erm, due to my absence, I decided to do a chapter that has 50% the rules- _but 200% more headaches for Kalina, Griffin, and most importantly, the commander._**

 **Please, let me know what your favorite rules are, I'd like an idea on what rules to actually write the event for- 130 is a particular favorite of mine, but there are others as well that deserve their own mini-chapter. Just let me know!**

 **For those of you following the Battleshippening, I'll get to that soon as well. Things are simply hectic right now. I hope you enjoyed the chapter!**

 **Caboose out.**


	7. GFL: Rules of HQ 131-145

**GFL: RULES OF HQ 131-145**

* * *

 **Rule 131**. ST AR15, we understand that you can switch between ammunition types, but please let **someone** know before you requisition over a thousand rounds(!) of each type you can use. The .300 Blackout rounds are expensive and difficult to get.

 **Rule 132**. Contrary to what SR-3MP and Super-Shorty claim, there is **no such thing** as a "lolicon radar". There are too many cases of certain T-Dolls refusing to be around the Commander, "Decreasing overall combat effectiveness".

132a. Whoever is giving her the single-use cell phones, stop **IMMEDIATELY** _._ The PRC's police force is tired of her calling them about said 'lolicons', and is threatening to sever important contracts.

132b. "SR-3MP; the joke is getting old. The Commander has proven to be reliable, but more importantly, my megaphone is **NOT** a replacement for your 'anti-lolicon warning system'. Don't make me tell you again." -RO635

 **Rule 133.** Whoever's been painting graffiti with green spray paint in the alleyway, please don't. While it was quite impressive, the Commander spent hours cleaning it up.

133a. "M4A1 is _not_ the culprit- whoever started the rumors about her and green spray paint, you don't know what you're talking about!" -M16A1

 **Rule 134.** AK-47, stop challenging M16A1 to "trials of durability". It doesn't matter who came first, or who has the longest history. You tracked mud all throughout the base, and damaged multiple rooms with your explosives!

 **Rule 135.** Likewise, any drinking challenges shall be funded out of personal stipends.

135a. Next time EITHER of you uses the Commander's credit card to buy alcohol, your stashes of 'Absolut' and 'Jack Daniels" will be sniffed out and confiscated.

135b. "M16, you should know better!" -ST AR15

 **Rule 136.** I don't know why it needs to be said, but we do not have the capability to produce anything from Star Wars. I know Jango Fett's Westar-34 looks like the Luger, but 16LAB is busy as it is.

136a. Well, for now at least.

136b. Addendum A has been removed under the same premise previous rules; while super useful, most of those weapons are not practical yet.

 **Rule 137**. M16, please stop trying to spread the virus to others. They still love you like family even if they don't have it.

 **Rule 138.** Using SOPMOD as a chainsaw is ill-advised, and is not insured under Griffin's policy.

 **Rule 139.** Please do not ask AK-12 to look you in the eyes during any discussion. We have enough psychiatrist bills already.

 **Rule 140**. AN-94 is not allowed to be alone in AK-12's room. This is the fifth time you are caught rummaging through AK-12's undergarments.

140a. "Cleaning her room" is not convincing when you are wearing her panties on your head!

 **Rule 141.** SAT8 is no longer allowed to touch or go near "Chopsticks" or "Banana."

141a. The list of things SAT8 should never get within grabbing distance has expanded to anything that is vaguely animal-shaped and fluffy.

141b. No one is allowed to Cosplay as "Gambier Bay" near SAT8 either.

 **Rule 142.** Whoever took pictures of AR-15 dressing up, please step forward so the rest of the AR team can have **Ẁ̵̧͈̈́̆ o̴̮̿̆̀ Ŗ̷̝͘͝ d̸͎̣͝ S̸̙̝͒.̵̨̬̟̂̽̿**

 **Rule 143.** Applying excessive emotional load on AK-12 is strictly forbidden; death or serious injury may result from emergency shutdown of emotion module.

 **Rule 144.** Get on the rifle, Gepard.

144a. No, this is not supposed to be an Evangelion reference, even if it does sound like it.

144b. Seriously, Gepard. SRS is waiting for you at the firing range. You've been putting your training on hold by taking in more paperwork.

144c. Gepard, please stop waiting until the last hour to fire your rifle. And stop running away every time you shoot!

144d. Gepard is to be barred from bringing in paperwork to the range, and, if necessary, must be tied down with zip-ties or whatever to prevent her from running off.

144e. Clause D. shall no longer be in effect, in light of Gepard's apparent self-esteem and anxiety issues.

144f. All staff assisting Gepard are to help to foster a welcoming and friendly environment for the poor girl.

144f-1. Fostering a friendly environment for her DOES NOT INCLUDE FORMING A CHEERLEADING SQUAD! It'll only make her anxiety worse.

144g. " _You have my sincerest apology, Gepard."_ ~Mr. Kruger

 **Rule 145.** _**DO NOT**_ allow P7 to read the 'OSS Simple Sabotage Manual.'

145a. Ever.

145b. Seriously.

145c. Don't.

* * *

 **Notes!**

 **So...Rule 145...that's the last of what we've come up with on the doc, and it seems I've lost access to the very first document. So, any new rules will have to come in either by your reviews/PMs, or anything else I can think of. That, and of course, writing mini-chapters for the right Rules. Look forward to that.**

 **Well, that's all for now.**

 **Caboose out.**


	8. GFL: Rules of HQ 146-160

**GFL: RULES OF HQ 146-160**

* * *

 **Rule 146.** G11, You may _not_ trade your weapon for a Dakimakura version of it. You already get in trouble for sleeping as it is.

 **Rule 147.** No, we cannot use IDW as a weapon against Sangvis Ferri.

147a. We already tried it.

 **Rule 148.** No, Architect is not a slave to the Commander, or to anyone else in Griffin. At this point she is here by her own choice.

 **Rule 149. "** Architect, cease and desist with your 'accidents'. It's one thing to replace a wall, it's another to lose an entire _wing_ of the base, as well as much of the armory and hangar!"

149a. "Commander, do not threaten to send her back to the Sangvis. She is a valuable subject for my experi- I mean...valuable member of Griffin and Kruger." -Persica

149b. "Calm down Commander, and leave me out of this." -Mr. Kryuger

 **Rule 150.** MDR is to lose _all_ access to the Base's wifi network for the next week. You know what you did.

 **Rule 151.** Stop trying to repair the broken M4 Shermans outside the base. They were abandoned for a reason, and G&K's insurance doesn't cover Tanks. Leave that to the Military.

151a. Same applies to any other vintage equipment. There is no way the Commander can afford the logistics if G&K doesn't cover it.

 **Rule 152.** K11 is not a dummy being used by Architect, we wouldn't put a Sangvis in a mass manufactured Doll.

152a. "Let it go, sis!" -*REDACTED*

152b. "But can't I at least check?" -*ASLO REDACTED*

 **Rule 153.** Whoever made the comics of AR Team as college girls, report to the Commander, _immediately_. Your talents shall be used elsewhere.

 **Rule 154.** To anyone that finds a futuristic T-Doll not from this world, leave it alone.

154a. You would think we learned from Elphelt.

 **Rule 155.** All attempts to recreate "Black Hawk Down" are to stop, effective **immediately.**

155a. Same applies for "Red Dawn", "Behind Enemy Lines", or anything from Call of Duty games... We have enough PTSD here as it is.

 **Rule 156.** Stop with the "Thanos" memes, MP5. That meme is literally older than anyone else alive now.

 **Rule 157.** Yes, the Fairies are technically drones. No, that does not mean we can start building an air force. Sangvis Ferri is already way ahead of us, we don't need more arms races.

 **Rule 158.** To those out there thinking that Sangvis Ferri's Dinergates are pulling a Skynet on their creators, stop it. RO635 has been getting strange looks, and we've received a formal complaint from ***Redacted***. We already _had_ an apocalypse!

 **Rule 159.** Stop calling STAR 15 a NEET, she's one of the most efficient Tactical Dolls we have.

159a. Right?

 **Rule 160.** The Commander does _not_ have a fox-like Babushka who just so happens to be Nagant M1895. Who even comes up with these?

* * *

 **Note** : Thank you, to those who reviewed and put forth your ideas.

I have a secret project I've been working on (Read; two stories I've had in the pot boiling over, making no progress until I received proper inspiration from _this_ fic). Some of you may recognize it from the GFL Discord, several months ago. The rules here will be applied, and the Commander's headache shall become a favorite case study!

Look forward to it!


	9. GFL: Rules of HQ 161-175

**GFL: Rules of HQ 161-175**

 **Notes at the bottom!**

* * *

 **Rule 161.** Attempts to summon Servants are prohibited.

161a. Same goes for any _other_ characters from any gacha games.

161b. "No matter how often the Commander jokingly complains, life in a PMC is not a Gacha! IOC simply makes what they can with the resources we give them.

 **Rule 162.** "As flattering as it is, Mr. Kryuger is not, in any way or form, Solid Snake." -Miss Helian

162a. "I thought I said no Metal Gear references!" -Commander

162b. "..." -Mr. Kryuger

 **Rule 163.** Time Travel is prohibited. Period.

 **Rule 164**. To all T-Dolls, please stop asking MG42 to cut down trees. Yes, her nickname is "Buzzsaw" and yes, she most certainly can shred trees. However, we get in enough trouble with protesting organisations as it is. We don't need the Environmentalists to have a _good_ reason to sue Griffin!

 **Rule 165.** Congratulations, Welrod and Spitfire. You brought home yet another Sangvis Ringleader. The commander is sure to reward you.

165a. "AS SOON AS _SOMEBODY_ GETS ME OUT CONTAINMENT!"

 **Rule 166.** Flamingoes may be extinct, but that doesn't mean you are authorized to make robotic ones. Seriously, we need those resources for more T-Dolls!

 **Rule 167.** Stop calling Ration boxes 'Pandora's Boxes'. Yes, that includes you FNC; no matter how much you consider chocolate to be hope, we already have plenty of apocalyptic plagues in this world.

167a. "I consider the veggie burgers and beef enchiladas horrible enough to be evil."

 **Rule 168.** Due to Ringleaders being Sangvis in nature, Griffin's insurance policy covers damage incurred _from_ them. Causing physical harm to Architect, Alchemist, or any others will be paid for out of pocket.

168a. See Rule 65, Addendum C.

 **Rule 169.** It shouldn't need to be said, but Kalina's makeup is off limits.

169a. "Hey, what about the rest of her stuff?"

 **Rule 170.** The "TAURUS" Missile on display is _not_ to be converted into a canoe.

 **Rule 171.** T-Dolls are now authorized to request a Kotatsu without express permission of the commander.

 **Rule 172**. "Patrolling Sector XX almost makes you wish for a nuclear winter."

172a. "Whoever wrote this, please report to the Griffin HQ. Mr. Kreuger would like to have _words_."

 **Rule 173.** "As per the results of the investigation into certain Griffin Commanders harboring hatred for baby seals, each sector base shall be given synthetic reproductions. This is for fostering a more positive relationship with wildlife."

173\. "And they're cute!" -P7

 **Rule 174.** "Colt is to refrain from leaping through holes in frozen water. We saw what you did to those carpets last winter."

 **Rule 175**. T-Dolls are to exercise caution when driving electric mopeds, especially with passengers.

17a. " _Especially_ with the Commander. Humans are squishy~!"

* * *

 **Notes:** **Hello everyone, Caboose here.**

 **I'm back, sorta. Medical complications, work, and college have been doing their best to attack me on all sides. But worry not! I managed to get Contender!**

 **Now, for the bad news. As of 10/23/2019, I am marking this story as complete. I have long run out of rules from the original document (Which I lost access to, and have been making do with what little I had left until recently) I'm not even sure if the original doc is still being updated, as people lose interest over time.**

 **HOWEVER! I am not done with this story, nor with Girls Frontline. _If_ everything works out, I'll get a story on it soon, as well as short stories expanding on the circumstances behind these rules. Hoping that Murphy's Law doesn't screw with me.**

 **If you want to influence which ones get fleshed out, please just tell me. Reviews go quite far to motivate authors, myself included!**

 **My in game Friend ID is: 13828. Feel free to message me, or stop by the dorm in game.**

 **TLDR: This story is complete, though I will be sure to add more in the future.**

 **Thank you all, for your support!**

 **Caboose**


	10. GFL: Rules of HQ 176-190

**GFL: Rules of HQ 176-190**

* * *

My thanks to fellow Fanfiction writer GrandLeviathan for some of these rules, and for making me want to get more on a story I said was completed. I appreciate any and all suggestions~

XD

* * *

 **Rule 176.** Dummies may not be used as hugging pillows.

176a. _Especially_ UMP45's dummies. Even if you ask the Commander nicely, UMP9. The parts for dummy maintenance are too rare.

 **Rule 177.** Fully dummy-linked T-Dolls are to refrain from asserting dominance on unlinked Dolls. Bullying is not acceptable here at Griffin!

177a. This is addendum to Rule 32 and 33. Stop wasting dummies!

 **Rule 178.** You may not put IDW into a bag, just so you can say "The cat's out of the bag!"

178a. "Don't do it with cardboard boxes too, damn it!"

178b. "Nyeheheh~!"

178c. From now on, do not _EVER_ deny IDW her new cardboard boxes. Echelon Eight, the Commander will get you newer, better furniture than the boxes.

 **Rule 179.** Inviting Sangvis Ferri ringleaders into the base is not allowed.

179a. Not even for a romantic dinner, DRS-50.

 **Rule 180.** After much debate, the previous rule can be altered to allow friendly and peaceful visits from M16.

180a. "Uh….Ouroboros and Architect are in the grey area."

180b. "Don't you even think about taking my slave- I mean, my friend, Ouroboros!" -ST AR-15 (Who is most definitely not a NEET(!))

 **Rule 181. "** Actions that make T-Dolls go into heat will result in immediate punishment. The Commander especially!" - **[Redacted for Safety]**

181a. In the event of T-Dolls overheating, please spray with water until they cool down. Further overclocking is to cease, and affected T-Dolls report to Maintenance.

181b. Hissing like a cat does not change this.

 **Rule 182.** G36 respectfully requests everyone to stop worrying about her coolant systems. It's embarrassing her, though she's too nice to say it.

 **Rule 183.** All personnel wanting a raise _must go through official channels_ , as per IOP's Employee Policy Guidelines and G&K's financial systems. The Commander does _not_ cover such duties, and neither does Kalina.

183a. Believe us, there are good reasons for that!

 **Rule 184.** To whoever hacked the Base Intercom system, please stop playing the Stalker Campfire Song every 2 hours. There can be too much of a good thing, and you're making our human employees uncomfortable.

 **Rule 185.** Type 64, stop growing bamboo inside the base. Seriously, that's not extra security, it's a hazard!

185a. Appropriate gardening areas will be provided, but the public areas (including but not limited to Commander and Kalina's office, the cafeteria, expedition bay, HOC Bay, maintenance area and all Dorms) are _not_ to have any bamboo traps.

 **Rule 186.** Rifle T-Dolls are to never use bayonetts of bamboo again.

186a. Bamboo is no longer allowed as weapons in any way. Looking at _you_ , NTW!

 **Rule 187.** Even though we don't have age limits for T-Dolls, all "underage" T-Dolls are not allowed to be served drinks, with the exception at Jill's careful discretion.

187a. 416 is to be added to the "Do NOT Serve" list. May the tragedies never happen again.

 **Rule 188.** Attention all Staff and T-Dolls; if you see a red-headed "Angel" who claims to work for Logistics, keep her away from Vector, _**At Any Cost**_ _._

188a. The list has been expanded to AK47, M4A1, AR15, Dragunov, and SV-98. Insurance does not cover Crossovers, and the Commander will be sued!

 **Rule 189.** Hazard pay has been increased due to recent events of the Theater offensives. Furthermore, any previous rules banning T-Posing have been extended to cover the individual Commanders as well.

 **Rule 190.** Commanders "Ceia" and "FuryTomic", report to Main HQ, please. You know what you two did.


	11. G&K HQ: The Beginning and Rule 16

_**Sector 0X Recon Outpost Bravo**_

* * *

Deep in the wooded sectors of the local region, a team of androids settled into their newest accommodations.

Small and easy to miss in the forest, the prefab concrete structure wasn't much, but the dolls shrugged it off. Their mission rotation wouldn't last _too_ long, only a few weeks.

Sighing, the newest addition to Griffin and Kreuger's T-Doll forces made herself comfortable as the other girls settled in. She still wasn't used to the company, but at least they weren't threatening to draw weapons at the slightest twitch. Still, she was stuck doing low-risk missions, at least until her superiors could trust her.

Her annoyances about that aside, she did take the opportunity to observe what comprised of an android over nine thousand years before her time... and Team FN would be the first look.

The squad leader, FAL, and her adjutant, Five-SeveN, were currently patrolling the perimeter and setting up traps. The sniper T-Doll (A2 never caught her name) was out somewhere like she "Normally was." That left her and two others huddling around an old electric heater, making use of ammo crates as makeshift chairs.

"Miss Attacker Type 2," one of the smaller dolls stammered. "W-would you like some c-chocolate?"

The "Sangvis" model looked over. FNC, sporting her braid and constantly smudged with chocolate, was handing out a ration bar with shaky arms.

 _'Seems they're still not used to me... well, that's two ways, I guess.'_

"As I said, call me A2." The time-traveling android forced her face out of its stoic glare and tried to smile. Judging from how smaller dolls _didn't_ shrink back in fear, it was a good start. "...and sure, why not."

For the next several minutes, A2 closed her eyes and enjoyed the silence. _'This won't be too bad...'_  
That was until Five-SeveN returned.

" _Vous etes deja amis?_ " The handgun doll chuckled, noticing the bar of chocolate in A2's hands. "She doesn't usually open up to strangers this soon~"

A2 grunted. She followed FNC's example and tore the corner of the 'wrapper'. Having never had the chance to try human food, the prototype YorHa withheld her trepidation and took a cautious bite... followed by another and another.

Before she knew it, the only remains were the smears on her face and empty wrapper on the ground. And that, a single display of emotion, was enough to break the ice between her and Team FN.

* * *

Long into the dark hours of the night, the girls all started chattering- well, most of them. A2 still wasn't ready to open up about her past (or was it the future?) but sue her. She'd had teammates once, so she knew the basics of how team bonding worked.

Gossip, especially with FAL and Five-SeveN, seemed to be the straightest shot at doing so.

"...and so, hahaha, they were banned from carrying smoke grenades on their person while indoors, forever~!"

A2 hadn't quite followed along as she had hoped. Evidently, her confusion was evident, as FAL smirked at her. "Hmm, that reminds me. The Commander never had the chance to give you the full indoctrination process, _non_?"

Suddenly wary, the Attacker type android shook her head.

"Then here; I'll lend you my copy 'Les Nouvelles Commandes du Quartier General'." The automatic rifle-doll rummaged in her purse, bringing out a thin paperback booklet. "'Tis somewhat out of date, I'm afraid, despite the name, but I'm sure it'll be a good starting point."

Accepting it, A2 focused her vision and flipped through the book. "So they're what, basic SOP around the base? It can't be that-"

Despite being a highly advanced, and well experienced YorHa android capable of taking entire Machine factories singlehandedly, nothing could keep her straight face upon reading the contents. "Wha-! What, the hell?"

The other doll nodded sagely, while some of the others winced.

"Oui, that is the general reaction to reading them the first time."

Her words barely registered with A2. Her system was trying it's best to not falter, and she couldn't help but widen her eyes in horror. She looked up towards the smaller T-Doll shrinking into the corner.

"FNC...you...?"

"I-I know! Y-you, don't need to remind me..."

Five-SeveN chuckled into her hands, while FN-49 gave FNC a pat on the shoulder, "There there."

"As you can tell, the events that happen around HQ can be quite...catastrophic," FAL said, now flipping through an antebellum fashion magazine. "That said, I ask that you not judge anyone in there. Surely enough, we all get to make our marks in that little book, you see."

Dimly, A2 nodded and closed the manual. Still, her curiosity was getting the better of her...

"So... were you there for some of these? Just _how_ did all these rules happen?"

The (horribly) fashionable duo grinned, sharing a knowing look. "Well, Rule 26, for example, started when..."

* * *

And just like that, the weeks were set to fly by, though A2 didn't know it yet.

* * *

 **Author's Note: Well well well, what have we here?**

 **I want to thank each and every one of you who has read, reviewed, and followed this story. I am truly humbled. I'm still trying to cook up more rules, but, I thought to myself, "Why not actually take the next step and write them out?"**

 **Shout out to my best friend, named Purolru, for helping me with the french. Ich spreche _kein_** **Französisch, hahah.**

 **If I'm not jinxing myself, hopefully, there will be plenty more. In case you are confused about A2, I decided to move ahead and put her here, despite not quite debuting in her actual story yet. This and "The Long, Blinding End" will be tied together, but I'll keep (much of) the funny stuff here.**

 *** _bows_ *  
Thank you very much!**


End file.
